i ask. i come back. i turn back. i think. i think.

IMPORTANT
i would strongly advise of you
to wait for the music to load then read.
or if you hear no sound after a while,
either yr not using the right browser or plugin,
or maybe yr speakers are not plugged in,
bad connection. something.
but definitely, i've uploaded a song,
and it sync/comes with the following words:

i didn't know i could get back.

but strangely, i am back.

and i realized, that i can.
i could. i want. i am too.

that i'm able to walk.
able to stand.
able to receive.
and able to know.

that this is true.
nothing alse is.
or could be.
or maybe.
or never be.

i think i can.

and pray that everyone will.

i hope. i wish.
i feel. i think.

it starts now.

it begins.

now.

and here goes….
_________________________________


everything seems perfectly structured.
things work. and things fail. it goes on.
like a routine.
i tracked these things.
asking, seeking, wondering.
i note it down.

then suddenly, i recall some memories.
it tested my current state.
i could somehow, feel it.
i could describe a sense. a space. a time.
a story.

somehow. in another. in within.

it somehow makes you think.
makes me think. atleast.

but i guess, this is really what
everything is. the meaning.
the repetitive.

it repeats. i jump and stretch my body.
pulling my fingers.
my body seems alive.
yet, it only exists in my mind.

ok, lets say i don't look.
i just walked and i think.
and then i ask?
try not looking.
try not observing.
and this thing,
could and is really, working.

ok.
what am i myself?
you think is my arrangement of sentence?
you could be right. but in my reality,
it is right. i am, right.
and you, i don't know really.
i don't understand.
because its "you".
and i am i.
cliché?

isn't life one?

now, the best part,

beauty.

in within. external. internal.
real. fade. come. go. in. out.

love.

always equivalent of one another.
nothing is perfect.

but love is.

denied that, and that is,
simply,

not love.

simple as that.

perfection, love, beauty.

it is all, simply, one.

"and nothing ever be perfect?"

it is a fact or lie?

i see it as both.

i've not ramble for too long.
they asked, "have you been blogging?"

uhmm...no, not really.
i've got my moleskine now.

"what the fuck was that?"

that, i asked my pathetic self.
what kind of fuckin answer is that
of you giving to someone?
no, really. i ask. i ask. i ask.
i ask. i ask. i come back. i turn back.
i walk. and walk. and think.
and think.

am i turnin stupid?
arrogant?
or maybe by far most,
ignorant?

or just paranoid.

this conclusion sometimes i prefer most.
ok, i lie. i friggin prefer to be in the fuckin latter
choice ofcourse, just to be FUCKIN PARANOID.

goddamnit.

i want, then, probably i get.
but why at first? of even wanting it?

it could-doesn't make sense.

but anyway, this would/could go on
forever. forget it, and i'll continue,
next time.

till then.

i'm back.

i think.

many cheers.

-chinyew

p/s: oh yeah, i begged of you to sit through
till the music finishes, in respect of the band.
its a pretty good composition by the way.
how long is another of 7 minutes of time
is gonna take you away of from your life?

it's a total 13+ minute track.