Day 20

we usually get judge by people.
accuse of being rebels.
accuse of being selfish.
self-obsess ego maniacs.
and especially, highly sensitive,
and emotional.

and sometimes weird too.
rambles too much of theories-philosophy.

and to a certain extend, crazy.

told my friend, that if i ever start
acting really crazy, pls let me know.
cause crazy people will never know
that they're crazy.

and sometimes we hate to mix around.
especially new people. why? because we
don't like to be judge.

we like to cling on to memories.
memories that shape our work.
memories that remind us of our feelings.

expect to be really exciting at times
and really dull-boring at some certain times.
we are never moderate. or predictable.
we'll either turn out very rich or very poor.
we either feed you fat or starve you dead.
never expect for expensive trips.
expect alot of cheap hotels and hitch hiking.
but we'll try and make sure the toilet is clean
just for you.

never get too sensitive of our mood swings.
but be sensitive on our emotions.
most of us has very bad temper.
yet, we try to be as romantic as the movies are.

we'll never forget you.

and finally, there is no we, but you and me.
and i and you. we talk to ourselves most
of the time. like now.

except that its not we but i.

and i'm fucked in the brain.

sometimes. most of the time.

i think.

maybe.

sometimes.

i dedicate today's song to a friend
who everytime i listen to this song, i can't
help to imagined her tiny voice singing it,
in a dark lit room with a white piano in the
middle.

and here are the paintings for today:

Mew-Symmetry

I'm caught in the symmetry of your mind,
But I'm not happier than you.

I'm caught in the symmetry of your mind,
But I'm not happier than you.

Did I really see you, or was it a dream?

In that it was seamless,
Not a trace of wrong.

Words that we have spoken
Little did we know

No bigotry, no tears shed.
Oh, if only...

You tried to be polite,
Thinking you were right,
Only to find that you're unkind.

But ironically,
You will always be
Belle of the ball,
Atleast to me.

I'm caught in the symmetry of your mind,
But I'm not happier than you.

But my words are frail, not
Audible, they do...

Not even convince me.
Perhaps they are untrue.

Truly with you the worst is
Always true, and I gave

You all the benefits,
Of all the doubts I had.

Never hope to be
As benign as me.
Funny how you
Always get through.

But ironically,
You will always be
Belle of the ball,
Atleast to me.