Day 90: Progress

Progress is good so far.
I've made friends with the local.
Producers, art directors, production houses.
People know me now. But at least to judge
whether am i good or not.

I'm trying my best everyday.
To be good.
To let go my past.
My life in KL.

They say why am I so stupid,
still doing things for the one
who have betrayed me.
I've not many years to come
to realization to the fact
that the ones who abandon and
have hurt me.

Why am I so stupid?
I live in a world of romance.
I believe.

But am I wrong?
The person who have wronged me,
have truly wronged me.
And have no excuse for that.

Using hate is easier to let go.

Should I have let go now?
It's been half a year.

Should I hate, in able to forget,
and stop giving excuses?

Have I given enough to realize
that it wasn't my fault?

Why do I blame myself?

Why do I hold on to the memory?

Why?

It is not fair.

I wasn't wrong, yet I'm the one who suffer.

Yet the one who is wrong, prosper in life.

Is this reality?

Is this life?

I should make myself cold,

and lay low on the alcohol.

;p


-chinyew